On Saying “No.”

This is unfortunately becoming one of my most used words as of late. I don’t know if it’s because I’ve been consciously enlarging my circle of friends or because I’ve been stretched thin for recreational time as of late, but I feel as though I’ve been saying, “No.” a lot lately to many different people.

I’m the type of person who never wants to miss out on a get together, celebration, or something fun with friends. I want to be a part of the memories, the laughs, and the inside jokes.

As a child, I sometimes felt left out of those moments. Throughout my teenage years, I struggled to feel as though I was a part of that “inner circle.” Now that I’m an adult, it seems to be just the opposite. While I’m grateful for that, and for the fact people want to include me, I’m also learning I can’t be all things to all people.

Sometimes, I need to say no. But in doing so, I’ve felt empowered.

There came a time recently, where my “yes” answers began controlling my life. My schedule was made up of things I had said yes to, instead of things I wanted to do. I’m glad to be involved in ministry and volunteer for great organizations, but when I need to start scheduling a day to not be doing something, that’s a sad state of affairs.

You should be in control of your schedule. The desires of others should not be what controls your life.

Life is short, reader. Be empowered to say “No” to the things you really don’t want to do so that you can say “Yes” to the things, and the people, that matter.



1 Response
  • Dimitry
    November 8, 2015

    This post reminded me a lot of the message in the book “Essentialism: The Disciplined Pursuit Of Less” by Greg Mckeown.

    A major point in the book is that time is precious, and the people who say “yes” to everything end up doing a disservice to themselves & to others. It’s better to do fewer things well than to spread yourself too thin while trying to please others.

    Time should be spent in a way that maximizes the effect it has on your personal goals (whether personal or professional).

    I haven’t finished the book myself, but you should take a look if you have the inclination.

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