Sometimes I’ll create a post, but won’t share it right away. I wrote this a few months ago and I think it’s time to share it with you. Words are a powerful thing, friend.
But the question begs to be asked: If we want people to care, why not show them the vulnerability to start? Why must we make it so hard for others to care and then self-destruct on ourselves when they don’t meet the need we never showed them from the start?
I’m quite guilty of this very thing, reader. It’s something I’m becoming more aware of and something I hope to change. This past week, a lot went on in my personal life. I almost lost a loved one to a terrible car accident. It’s been touch and go for almost a week now and I’ve been amazed at those who have expressed concern, care, and warm thoughts. I’ve also been inwardly disenchanted by those who I expected more from. People surprised me. There were some who I thought would be asking how things are, asking how I am, how my family is, what they could do to help, etc. who didn’t. And those who I didn’t expect a lot from who pleasantly surprised me.
It always amazes me that what you sow is what you reap, but more so that whom you sow into is not always whom you reap from. I think somewhere along the line we bought into the theory that they’re one and the same, that sowing and reaping comes and goes from the same source. And maybe our actions (and our disappointment) speak to that. Life doesn’t always work that way and while that shouldn’t preclude us from investing into people, it should teach us to be careful of the expectations we place on others.
My heart is raw tonight for many reasons, but most of all, because there were things said and done that can’t be changed. I can’t reverse time and people can’t have a second chance at making this situation right. There may be a time in the future, but for now, I need to let this one go.
It’s a painful reminder that actions matter…and that words do too. Conversely though, it’s shown me certain people in a new light and to me, that’s a blessing.
Those who can see past the smile and into our soul are the people who shine brightest in the darkest of times. Those are the people we ought to sow into more purposefully and those are the people who someday we may have the benefit of reaping from, also.